Under Control
"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue
him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name."
-Psalms 91:14
We sat there on the curb, watching photos of my family drift eerily,
slowly into the street, their edges glowing and gradually turning
each photo into black ash. One family memory after another-gone.
It was the fourth of July. Actually it was the fifth, very early in
the morning. We weren't touring then, so we had hung out all day having
a barbecue with friends. Afterward, we went back to my house; my parents
were gone on a business trip about an hour away. We decided to watch
one of our favorite movies of all time, Rad. It's like the greatest
movie in the whole world.
Pretty soon a friend named Gary showed up and we stayed up until at
least three, eating popcorn and watching more movies. Finally, only
Dave, Gary, and I were left. Since it got so late, we all crashed
in the bedrooms upstairs.
Only Dave heard the persistent pounding that woke him up about an
hour later. It was pitch black. Someone was pounding on the front
door and wasn't showing any signs of stopping.
Dave made his way into the hallway upstairs. Sparks were falling down
through the entrance to the attic and into the hall on the second
floor. The house was burning!
Dave ran back to where Gary was sleeping. By now, the noise from the
fire was deafening. It sounded like a freight train was coming through.
He woke Gary up and yelled at him to wake me and then get out. Then
he ran back down the hall through the sparks and downstairs to see
who was at the door. It was jammed. Whoever was on the other side
had pounded so hard that it had messed up the door. Dave yanked and
pulled until he finally got it open.
There on the front porch stood a guy that seemed pretty wasted. "Your
house is on fire, man! You gotta get out now!" he screamed. His
girlfriend was in the car in the driveway. He told Dave that she was
calling 911.
Gary tried to wake me, but that's never an easy deal. I'm a very deep
sleeper-pretty much nothing can wake me up. I just shouted at Gary
to get away and turned over. Gary shook and yelled at me until I finally
understood that there was a fire in the house. Finally, we made our
way through the cinders and sparks, down the stairs, and into the
front yard. We all stood in the driveway in our underwear, watching
as the attic went up in flames.
Just then, a huge beam fell into my room, landing on my bed. The bed
burst into flames. Seconds later, the whole attic crashed down into
the rooms where we'd been sleeping. It happened that fast. If we hadn't
gotten out right then, I wouldn't be telling this story.
Ash, burning cinders, and heavy smoke pushed us to the other side
of the street. We sat down on the curb and stared at the burning house
in disbelief. All of my equipment was now toast. Everything in my
room was gone. Everything I owned was gone-except the boxers I was
wearing. I ended up borrowing some clothes for us from my friend down
the street.
Definitely the saddest thing was the sight of the photos from my parents'
wedding falling into the street like little glow-in-the-dark squares.
We tried not to dwell on the stuff that had burned. We were just amazed
and glad to have escaped with our lives. We had literally gotten out
within seconds of the attic collapsing.
As it all sunk in, we started focusing on what God had done. All of
the "what ifs" came into play. What if I hadn't invited
friends over? I might not have gotten out if I'd been alone, since
I sleep like a log.
The guy who woke Dave had been at a Fourth of July party and had gotten
too wasted to drive himself home, so he had called his girlfriend
to come pick him up. He lived a block from my parents. He and his
girlfriend had been together for a few years and she had driven to
his house hundreds of times before. That night, she made a wrong turn
and happened by my burning house. How crazy was that? She knew the
way to her boyfriend's house like the back of her hand. What if she
had never made that "mistake?"
Later, we came to find out just how much protection God had sent our
way.
That night, my older sister had awakened around three a.m. with a
strong, nagging feeling of unease. As she tossed and turned, frustrated
that she couldn't sleep, it slowly became clear to her that God was
urging her to pray. She finally got up and went into the bathroom
so that she wouldn't wake her husband. She later told us that she
sensed that she was supposed to pray for my safety. She prayed steadily
for an hour. Around four a.m.-the time that we got out of the house-she
finally felt peaceful enough to go back to bed.
God had worked through someone who knew him well and then through
someone who didn't seem to know him at all. He had it covered.
The firefighters determined that a bottle rocket had landed on the
shake roof of the house. The fire had begun raging about the time
that we fell asleep. Once the fire was completely out, they let us
back in to check things out. My room was totaled. Then we went to
the room Dave had slept in. The whole ceiling was gone. The only things
that survived the fire were Dave's-his shirt, his pants and his Bible.
They'd been protected somehow under a pile of stuff.
We never did go back to sleep, with all the fire trucks and the whole
ordeal. We finally left to grab some breakfast and then went on to
church. We were all pretty grungy and totally smelled like a campfire.
The smell of smoke gave us a weird feeling for a long time after that.
Later that day, we went over to Dave's and sat around talking and
writing about how, because of our relationship with God, we don't
need to worry about things or danger or anything, really. He gives
us everything we need to live.
In him, our lives are totally under control and we're free to just
be.
…And if you think your life is
under control
And if you think you're living under control
Cuz only the fool leaneth on his own
And so I sing to You with all my soul
Free to be without worry no more worry
Yes I'm free, free to be without worry
No more worry
1 2 3 a.m. and the house is burning down
4 a.m. the I AM grain of sand I am
You woke me not to worry
Yeah you woke me up not to worry
But what should I drink
What should I wear
What should I eat
Where should I sleep
Who gives me everything
So burn house burn house burn down
Josh Auer
PAX217
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